The audience is never wrong.

Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.

When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go.

Before you go to bed, write down three 'gratefuls' for the day and three 'did wells' (they can even include something as simple as doing the laundry)-the results can be amazing!

It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington.

You have to have faith that there is a reason you go through certain things. I can't say I'm glad to go through pain, but in a way one must, in order to gain courage and really feel joy.

If someone tells you that you cannot do something and you believe it, they are right.

It's also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I've been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That's why we're here, after all, to help others.

It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it's too bad that we don't have a system where the losing team has to pay the winning team's lawyers.

No one ever said life was fair. Just Eventful.

Comedy is tragedy plus time.

By the fall of 1918, it was clear that a nation's prosperity, even its very survival, depended on securing a safe, abundant supply of cheap oil.

Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily.

An economically peaceful and prosperous Sri Lanka is the dream of youth of the nation. My message for the youth is to collectively work for an inclusively developed Sri Lanka.

Applied Science is a conjuror, whose bottomless hat yields impartially the softest of Angora rabbits and the most petrifying of Medusas.

I truly believe that before I retire from public office, I'll be voting for a woman for president.

What I do when I create a character is put in details from all the people I know who might be like that person, and then put in a huge amount of myself.

If you only talk to a person's head and not their heart people won't listen to you.

To play the guitar well is easy, to play the guitar poorly is difficult.

Progress of mankind is the decadence of humanity.