The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake!

The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.

You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.

When people smile at a rich man, they are smiling at his wallet.

Succeeding in life and business is like falling in love with your wife (for those of you that are married). You can’t leave your wife at the mercy of another man and feel safe.

Teen drug use went up dramatically in the 1990s.

Love alone is not enough. Without imagination, love stales into sentiment, duty, boredom. Relationships fail not because we have stopped loving but because we first stopped imagining.

I became a Communist because I fell in love with a man who was a Red and entered the Army to take care of the Fascists, and I knew it would please him if I became one

Dancing and running shake up the chemistry of happiness.

I've been writing since I was 7, but before that, I was orally making stories.

Tears fall in my heart As tears fall on the town.

At sixty-three years of age, less a quarter, one still has plans.

If you love the things you do, you don’t age, you always remain young. Age is for the calendar.