The best revenge is living well.

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.

These pretzels are making me thirsty!

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.

The IRS! They're like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!

So let me get this straight. You find yourself in the kitchen. You see an éclair in the receptacle... and you think to yourself: "What the hell, I'll just eat some trash."

People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.

Keep your head up in failure and your head down in success.

Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.

Whatever you think you are, you are always bigger than that...

People have the right to call themselves whatever they like. That doesn't bother me. It's other people doing the calling that bothers me.

If you judge art by its cover, you efface the very essence of it

Sometimes healing comes after helping someone that is going through the same trauma you went through. Help yourself by helping others.

Do you think the wren ever dreams of a better house?

To be mature means to face, and not evade, every fresh crisis that comes

When you get up in the morning, you merely put on your clothes. When a colored man gets up in the morning, he puts on his armor.

When I was about 15, I picked up the guitar and learned how to play by going through Beatles chords books. I got this Christmas gift with the entire Beatles catalog.

He who never hurries is always on time.

Let our lives be pure as snowfields, where our steps leave a mark but no stain.