The best thing about bugs is their lack of self consciousness, also the ability to fly doesn't hurt.

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

What would people think?'Jesus said that people think all sorts of things. The human mind is like a cloud of gnats. Constant motion. That's why you have to look at the heart.'Oh, ' said Grandpa.

Man does not ask for nightmares, he does not ask to be bad. He does not will his own willfulness.

the real tests of life can come a child’s way at any moment,

A sneer is the weapon of the weak.

Artists live in unknown spaces and give themselves over to following something unknown.

American shows can go on for 20 years. I respond more to the British format. Three seasons is a long run for them to tell a story.

Even if God never did another good thing in our lives, we could spend the rest of this life praising Him for what He has already done.

The invasion only made matters worse. The occupation will not work, Iraq is unoccupiable, that will not work.

In fact, Capitalism has a vested interest in creating new wants and making people unhappy until they acquire the next good.

If you can get over this initial distrust that people have of strangers, you can do remarkable things.