The best way to clean up a son's room is to close the door and pretend it's not part of the house.

The best things in life aren't things.

People who live in glass houses have to wash their windows all the time.

There isn't a child who hasn't gone out into the brave new world who eventually doesn't return to the old homestead carrying a bundle of dirty clothes.

Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.

The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.

You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.

If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.

The things that matter most are not things.

This is not an easy time for humorists because the government is far funnier than we are.

I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.

Then one day a thought clicked my mind... and even theweirdest event in the past start Making complete sense...

Too many cooks spoil the broth.

Shahid Kapoor is my childhood crush

During the 1960s, I think, people forgot what emotions were supposed to be. And I don't think they've ever remembered.

My dream is to star in an animated movie and to have a toy made after me.

There are very few people who are not ashamed of having been in love when they no longer love each other.

There are no mistakes in life, and it's not about anybody being able to judge you.

I am extremely grateful. And that brings me back to reality on the days I am complaining about something.

I think the way it works is that when you're casting a movie, you usually want to work with people that you believe in.

Why beer is better than wine: human feet are conspicuously absent from beer making.