The biggest thing I remember is that there was just no transition. You hit the ground diapering.

But at the same time that the experience is pulling you apart, it's also bonding you. You have this joint venture! You both made this baby. And that's the thing I still can't get over

Having a baby dragged me, kicking and screaming, from the world of self-absorption.

The jewel in the baby product crown is the stroller. And if in America you are what you drive, then in Parentland, you are what you push.

And after you've done the acting, there's a lot of places you can put your input - in the editing, in the production of it, in the rewriting of it and so on

I'd distract myself until finally it was a combination of things. The show was over and I had time on my hands. I had taken time and played and just relaxed.

Marriage is just an elaborate game that allows two selfish people to periodically feel that they're not.

If a tree falls on your head in a forest and no one hears it, it still hurts.

A new child in the house is a huge tourist attraction. It's like Disneyland, except there the lines are longer and no one brings casseroles.

There was a period where our child's birth was getting really close, and we still had nothing. We were dangerously close to calling him Untitled Baby Project.

I always loved comedy, but I never knew it was something you could learn to do. I always thought that some people are born comedians ... just like some people are born dentists.

People start to lie more once they start to care less.

Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have you declared legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.

I grew up being the girl who would always tune in to watch famous people talk about their careers, how they handled scandals and mega fame. I'm trying to pick up tips.

My whole life, growing up, I always wanted to be in comedy. I never felt comfortable doing the 'teen hunk' thing.

I'm more conservative with make-up. My everyday look is a bit of concealer with lots and lots of mascara.

In the long run, it's not just how much money you make that will determine your future prosperity. It's how much of that money you put to work by saving it and investing it.

I don't quite see the 20th century as one of chaos. But I believe in certain inevitable outcomes of a materialist nature.

I am close friends with Marina Abamovich, so I love strong, very aggressive political art. She is like a mom who wants to adopt me.

I sing, and I really should've stuck with it, because it's really what I love to do. It's probably what I'm best at, too.

If you're having fun doing what you're doing, you're gonna really want to work hard at it.