The classic comedian says there's nothing that's taboo; if you laugh at one thing you've got to laugh at everything, that comedy is taking people to dark areas and showing them the light.

Quotes are for dumb people who can't think of something intelligent to say on their own.

Once a week, I like to slip into a deep existential depression where I lose all my sense of oneness and self-worth.

I love you just the way you are but you don't see you like I do. You shouldn't try so hard to be perfect. Trust me, perfect should try to be you.

I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer

If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?

Laughter is the best medicine, y'know, besides medicine.

Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.

If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I'd still say no.

I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.

Maybe life on earth could be heaven, doesn't just the thought of it make it worth a try?

If they aren't laughing at your goals, you are not dreaming big enough.

The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out

My father chose my name , and my last name was chosen by my ancestors . That’s enough, I myself choose my way

In my position, I could be a debutante. But we only got to this position by being a politically active family.

We all have an expectancy of something, but who's to say it always goes that way? Nine times out of 10, life never goes that way.

Without professionalism I'd be an amateur, and the clients I want don't hire amateurs.

Have patience. Wait until the mud settles and the water is clear. Remain unmoving until right action arises by itself.

It's been too many years since I've played live as myself as opposed to in a fake band for a film.

Our prejudices are our robbers, they rob us valuable things in life. People only see what they are prepared to see.

People often overestimate what they can reasonably achieve in a year. But they vastly underestimate what they can achieve in 5 years.