The common notion that free speech prevails in the United States always makes me laugh.

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.

Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.

It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.

Thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action.

Good artists exist simply in what they make, and consequently are perfectly uninteresting in what they are.

Percy looked at his friends. "I'm getting tired of this guy's shirt.""Combat time?" Piper grabbed her horn of plenty."I hate wonder bread, " Jason said.Together, they charged.

In government, one actress is enough.

You know one little way in which baseball changes us? We don't even think twice about Japanese names anymore. You know what I mean?

We need to have a little humor in our lives. .If the time ever comes when we can't smile at ourselves, it will be a sad time.

God's purpose in Creation and in Redemption are fulfilled in us as together in worship, we are renewed in and through Christ, and in the name of Christ we glorify God.

The press briefing today I believe has lost much of its usefulness.

Not 'Don' in that I-m-sorry-and-now-you'll-forgive-me-like-you-always-do-way. Not this time, Keenan." (Donya)