The finger of God never leaves identical fingerprints.

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.

The eagle may soar; beavers build dams.

The US has not imposed democracy in Yemen, its people have.

The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.

Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth.

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.

The government is shutting down the coal industry, they say it's cheaper to draw nuclear power off the French grid and cheaper to buy coal from Colombia.

Our friends have a way of reminding us of how fabulous we are when the rest of the world has forgotten.

In the grand scheme of life, nobody grows old keeping their soul unblemished.

Any man's death diminishes me because I am involved in mankind and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls it tolls for thee.

My first open mic was fantastic. I crushed. And my second mic was as bad as my first one was good.

You can be happy if you know this secret: Some things are within your power to control and some things are not.

If you want leaders, you must become a leader yourself!

I go — as others already crucified have gone. And think not we are weary of crucifixion. For we must be crucified by larger and yet larger men, between greater earths and greater heavens.

I thank God to have it. I thank God that I finished it. And I hope that I will live enough to take profit of it.

This is truly marvelous work full of mystery, nostalgia, joy, The Color of Whimsy.

The amount of time that a young girl spends wearing pink will be inversely proportional to her future income.