The first rule of holes: When you're in one stop digging.

I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag.

On the whole, I prefer not to be lectured on patriotism by those who keep offshore maildrops in order to avoid paying their taxes.

What we have here, fellow citizens, is a crassly egocentric, raving twit.

It's like, duh. Just when you thought there wasn't a dime's worth of difference between the two parties, the Republicans go and prove you're wrong.

It is possible to read the history of this country as one long struggle to extend the liberties established in our Constitution to everyone in America.

Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful. I only aim at the powerful. When satire is aimed at the powerless, it is not only cruel -- it's vulgar.

If you ever get to the place where injustice doesn't bother you, you're dead.

One thing that corporations do not do is give out money out of the goodness of their hearts.

I know: "Guns Don't Kill People." But I suspect that they have something to do with it. If you point your finger at someone and say, "Bang, bang, you're dead," not much actually happens.

How the American right managed to convince itself that the programs to alleviate poverty are responsible for the consequences of poverty will someday be studied as a notorious mass illusion.

Tea- The sweetness of love, The fragrance of flowers, The comfort of a friend, The warmth of a hug-Such great delight gingerly poured from a single pink teapot.

Be satisfied in your ignorance for there is no safety in knowledge.

To be brave one short instant is no easy matter it is easier to die for a cause than to live for it.

Beautifully-acted and precisely observed, ILO ILO is an amazing debut, full of heart and intelligence.

Because I killed a guy in real life, and because my character kills a guy onstage, they said I could never do anything this great again. I resented that.

The secret to a happy marriage? Do whatever your wife tells you. 'Yes, dear.' And breathe.

Responsibility is always a sign of trust.

I'm not super-conservative, but a bit of tradition is nice.

Rule a kingdom as though you were cooking a small fish - don't overdo it.