The first time I lay actual eyes on the real David Lynch on the set of his movie, he's peeing on a tree...Mr. David Lynch, a prodigious coffee drinker, apparently pees hard and often.

I do things like get in a taxi and say, "The library, and step on it.

It can become an exercise in trying to get the reader to like and admire you instead of an exercise in creative art.

One of the things that makes Wittgenstein a real artist to me is that he realized that no conclusion could be more horrible than solipsism.

If your fidelity to perfectionism is too high, you never do anything.

I know I'm paranoid, but am I paranoid enough?

This might be one way to start talking about differences between the early postmodern writers of the fifties and sixties and their contemporary descendants.

How odd I can have all this inside me and to you it’s just words.

Everybody is identical in their secret unspoken belief that way deep down they are different from everyone else.

In the day-to-day trenches of adult life, there is actually no such thing as atheism. There is no such thing as not worshipping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship.

In reality, there is no such thing as not voting: you either vote by voting, or you vote by staying home and tacitly doubling the value of some Diehard's vote.

Money changes people. This process is more commonly known as trading.

Yes, Father. They have the bravest hearts, the noblest souls, and the shiniest armor in all the world.”“Shiniest armor?” repeated King Ban.

Solitude is better than the society of evil persons.

This book is dedicated to Wilbur and Orville Wright, without whom air sickness would still be just a dream.

This dream of our youth will fade out as the splendor Fades from the skies when the sun sinks to sleep.

God did not burden the United States with a diversity of backgrounds, ideas and religions, He blessed America with them.

I know how to handle women who act like ladies, but my landlady ain't no lady. Sometimes I even wish I was living with my wife again so I could have my own place and not have no landladies.

Learn to say no, with an eye to saying yes to something else.

The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get.

If war breaks out, I will fight for Hitler since such a war would be against Jewry.