The good die young, because they see it's no use living if you have got to be good.

A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.

Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open.

I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately, instead of at three o clock in the morning.

When archaeologists discover the missing arms of Venus de Milo, they will find she was wearing boxing gloves.

The trouble with life is that there are so many beautiful women and so little time.

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two weeks.

Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock.

You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.

My only regret in the theater is that I could never sit out front and watch me.

There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless.

A soulless city creates soulless people!

He pinched the remaining chapters’ pages delicately between his fingers and sighed. He always hated reaching the end of a good book.

Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger.

A one woman cabaret of emotional impressionism

In order to look special wearing the chancy unique; it must be worn with your persona, and if the two don't blend, then the look becomes pear-shaped.

If you have the opportunity to play this game of life you need to appreciate every moment. a lot of people don't appreciate the moment until it's passed.

Fridays are the hardest in some ways: you’re so close to freedom.

The best way to fight terrorism is not through guns. It's through pens, books, teachers and schools.

I don't think a guy that really has no understanding about people, or has no interest in understanding people would make a good film composer.

A deeper truth the camera can see can be more surprising than even the director imagined it could be. That's a wonderful thing that grows and happens in films.