The great dialectic in our time is not, as anciently and by some still supposed, between capital and labor; it is between economic enterprise and the state.

The modern conservative is engaged in one of man's oldest exercises in moral philosophy; that is, the search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.

Oligopoly is an imperfect monopoly. Like the despotism of the Dual Monarchy, it is saved only by its incompetence.

Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite.

But there is merit even in the mentally retarded legislator. He asks the questions that everyone is afraid to ask for fear of seeming simple.

Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for economists.

If all else fails immortality can always be assured by adequate error.

The process by which banks create money is so simple that the mind is repelled.

There is certainly no absolute standard of beauty. That precisely is what makes its pursuit so interesting.

Simple minds, presumably, are the easiest to manage.

Every corner of the public psyche is canvassed by some of the most talented citizens to see if the desire for some merchandisable product can be cultivated.

Some of the epidemic may overwhelm society as a physical expression of energy hysteria.

People can bear anything.

A Conservative is a man who will not look at the new moon out of respect for that ancient institution the old one.

Cakes are special. Every birthday, every celebration ends with something sweet, a cake, and people remember. It's all about the memories.

Sleep is out... tired is the new black.

If you're in the White House, it's your house, and you can invite whatever friend you want.

My children have made me a better man, which is - in the end, that's probably more important than two more comedy specials or being in better shape.

It is easier to port a shell than a shell script.

I tried to walk a line between acting lawfully AND testifying falsely, but I now realize that I did not fully accomplish that goal.