The great thing about 'Allen Gregory' is that we try to make it really questionable that the things he says have happened, have really happened. We like that ambiguity.

It's always better to shock people and change people's expectations than to give them exactly what they think you can do.

Germany's amongst my top three places in the world I'd like to live.

I want to meet the man who saw a turtle and said, "People will LOVE the ninja version of that."

I assume everything I do in life is gonna be a failure, and then if it turns up roses, then I'm psyched.

If you're trying to make someone happy, you gotta try and make them happy.

New Orleans is like the bad-kid island in 'Pinocchio.'

I don't like to say mean things about people's hard work.

I mean, I find things that happened in real life to be the funniest - things that you observe instead of crazy abstract things, you know.

I mean, being shot in slow motion doing cocaine by Martin Scorsese is, like, maybe every actor's dream. Nothing will compare to it. Except maybe having kids.

I play a lot of games on my iPhone. There is a game called Rat on a Scooter that I will promote as much as possible because it has brought me so much joy.

THough we loved school, we hadn't realized how important education was until the Taliban tried to stop us.

That’s what happens when you crowd enough folks into the same sandbox: eventually they’re gonna start throwing a fit over who gets what part to play with.

A must read book

... plunged into chance, --that is to say, swallowed up in Providence

For why are we here if not to try to fathom one another? Not through facts alone, but with the full extent of our imaginations. And what are stories if not tools for imagining?

Building businesses takes tremendous stamina, and success isn't achieved without it.

The cross is the gift God gives to his friends.

Many of us suffer from temptations from which we have no business to suffer.

I have two amazing things in my life: I'm pain-free and I'm debt-free.

Americanism is a question of principle, of idealism, of character. It is not a matter of birthplace, or creed, or line of descent.