The hardest tumble a man can take is to fall over his own bluff.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

But the sun will rise the day after tomorrowA millennium without us silences our last echoTo tiny fragments even our plastics are reducedIn Eden Reincarnate all life but ours is renewed

Some astrophysicists have convinced themselves that the fifth significant figure of the fine structure constant has changed over the past ten billion years.

Africa has within it everything it needs to reach the peace. But Africa does not do Africa, Africa does foreigners

I was a football player and competitor in life.

People always like stories about the little guy fighting the big guy.

Surprises, like misfortunes, seldom come alone.

When you are not near me, I make the sound of one hand clapping.

I am doing better now though one of my legs is shorter than the other due to the operations.

Recognize joy when it arrives in the plain brown wrappings of everyday life.

Time is what death needs to grow people in.