The higher someone's profile, the easier it is for a defendant to trade him up to the feds. Mr. Big is always a better catch than Mr. Small.

Has there ever been anybody, real or fictional, whiter than Betty Crocker?

About 25 years ago, I started out as a reporter covering politics. And that sort of just evolved into organized crime, because organized crime and politics were the same thing in Boston.

Which of the following two groups contains the most former grand dragons of the Ku Klux Klan - the first 59 Tea Party people you run into this morning, or the U.S. Senate Democratic caucus?

I think among the retired FBI agents there are some who would not like to see him come back, but I think the people running the FBI now are interested in catching him.

Barack Obama is like the old joke about boats. The two best days of owning a boat are the day you buy it and the day you sell it.

As an American citizen, I'm not asking for any special treatment - the only thing I ask and want is to be treated just like an Illegal Alien.

Joe Biden was first elected to the Senate in 1972 at age 30. Somewhere around 1992, he should have had to go out and get a real job.

Anyone who doesn't think the welfare-industrial complex is trying to increase dependency isn't paying attention.

An armed society is a free society.

Michelle Obama - they don't call her Mooch-elle for nothing.

Who would you impress if the world was blind?

Never congratulate a doctor for the fast recovery of a patient.

Behind every cloud is another cloud.

The big difference in those days was that in England the Government subsidized TV, in America we work on TV so we can subsidize the Government.

Libertarians believe consenting adults have the right to do whatever they choose, except band together.

President George Washington used to wear a wig and make-up. I mean, c'mon, if he could do it, I can do it.

The mirror reflects perfectly; it makes no mistakes because it doesn't think. To think is to make mistakes.

The soul of God is poured into the world through the thoughts of men.

The marvelous thing about a joke with a double meaning is that it can only mean one thing.

Scandal is the sport of its authors, the dread of fools, and the contempt of the wise.