The idea of doing stand-up is terrifying to me.

Growing up in Rhode Island, my friends would have strung me up if I had been a Yankees fan.

I don't think you should just do what makes you happy. Do what makes you great.

You do not have to be fearless, just don't let fear stop you.

People are demanding so much of me. They really want to pigeonhole me.

I have expanded my mind and destroyed my liver but I didn't give up.

Cats do not abide by the laws of nature.

I'm not the biggest fan of comedies where nothing is real.

It doesn't really matter to me whether the 7-year-olds are big fans of my work. I'm happy just to be working at all. I do think it will be nice to have a movie that my son can watch.

Knowing that I'm not a model and I'm never going to be has relieved me of the pressure of looking good. If you don't establish yourself as McDreamy then you don't have to live up to it.

I eat stickers all the time dude!

Sometimes it takes heartache to put you on the path toward making your heart full.

Simply handing over your iPod to a friend, your blind date, or the total stranger sitting next to you on the plane opens you up like a book." (Steven Levy)

You have the potential to make healthy choices and balance your priorities no matter where you are on your life journey.

Carrot Top is a nickname that people call me and I thought that it was more marketable.

Whatever you think is delusion.

As long as there are prisons, police, armies, navies; we are not civilized. When the Earth joins together and uses the Earth intelligently, that will be the beginning of civilization.

Ask yourself whether you are happy, and you cease to be so.

And whichsoever way thou goest, may fortune follow.

You need a certain amount of nerve to be a writer, an almost physical nerve, the kind you need to walk a log across a river.

Love can make up for a lot.