The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the number of people in it.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Nothing in life was as ugly as death.

China is the same age as I am, and even I have to admit that she wears it better!" He laughed, then stopped and peered at her. "Because I'm a skeleton" he explained.

Ravings, in short, jealousy of the past, the worst kind of all.

I am for 100% equality across the board for everybody, in all walks of life.

Our love lives because I live.

If it sounds good to me and I hate my voice, so if I'm willing to listen to my voice over and over again, it's a hit. Guaranteed it'll be a hit.

Until the President produces a responsible deficit reduction plan, I'm not going to the White House to negotiate with myself.

Faced with destruction, the Jewish people survived.

Woman is the heart of humanity ... its grace, ornament, and solace.

It's really never fair to judge people because none of us know what's going on inside anyone else's head.