The king of comedy is dead. Richard Pryor was the king of comedy. The rest of them are the king of copycats.

A new broom can sweep the floor, but an old broom knows where the dirt is.

People don't want to hear the truth, they never do. They wanna live in some kind of fantasy. And then when they get caught up in it, they start being in denial because they don't want to be wrong.

I have nothing to do with racism in America; it was here when I got here.

We have a lot of black Anglo-Saxons. Their skin is black, but their brain is white. When I get real mad at them, I call them graham crackers.

If your hair is relaxed, white people are relaxed. If your hair is nappy, they're not happy.

People in America worship money, and a white man's face on a green piece of paper does not make me wealthy. My health makes me wealthy. I used to work at a hospital, so I know the real deal.

White people are very good at acting like they're not racist. They deserve an Academy Award for that.

Listen, we've got one little ol' black president, and white folks are upset, but they've had 43.

Handshaking means, 'I don't have a weapon.'

If you have money and you have fame, but you don't have any confidence in your blackness, then it's all for nothing.

Scent of old books a mystery

Sure I played, did you think I was born at the age of 70 sitting in a dugout trying to manage guys like you?

The miracle of love comes to you in the presence of the uninterpreted moment. If you are mentally somewhere else, you miss real life.

When I feel good, the crowd is behind me, have a great spirit, I think I can be very tough to beat.

Since we do not take a man on his past history, we do not refuse him because of his past history. I never met a man who was thoroughly bad. There is always some good in him if he gets a chance.

Twitchy little ferret, aren't you, Malfoy?

People ask me, "What would you be doing without baseball?" I don't know... super-sizing fries?

What's kind of weird is that when I'm writing I don't know where I'm going to go.

When Lord Kelvin was in this country [U.S.], he said that nothing interested him so much as Mr. Hewitt's work and his vacuum lamp.

I bought a million lottery tickets. I won a dollar.