The last man that makes a joke owns it.

Trust everybody, but cut the cards.

A man's idea in a game of cards is war, cruel, devastating, and pitiless. A lady's idea of it is a combination of larceny, embezzlement and burglary.

A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.

The past always looks better than it was; it's only pleasant because it isn't here.

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.

What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.

An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.

Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals.

I niver knew a pollytician to go wrong ontil he's been contaminated by contact with a business man.

Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions.

Life isn't all about money but this life is nothing without it!

Make Your wish Your Dream and Your Dream Your Goal

I'm proud to be an atheist - it helps me stand for so much more and fall for so much less.

I had a Tesla. I was one of the first cats with a Tesla. But I'm telling you, I've been on the side of the road a while in that thing.

Our bells are worn threadbare with ringing for victories

Football fanaticism and high intellect seldom go together.

Here's a six-foot-ten guy in sneakers and the lady's asking me, 'Profession?'

More is learned in pain than in pleasure.

It may be old hat, but I see no reason to close off what is for me a fruitful subject of inquiry, especially so for one, like me, who is very much interested in creating stories and novels of ideas.