The last time a straight man worked in the fashion industry, we got a fanny pack.

A Muslim allowed a topless Jew to sit on his camel. And we say we can't live side by side? I say we try and we can and we will. And you don't even have to be topless. L'chaim.

We usually have margaritas on Thursdays but since it's Tuesday I'll make an exception.

Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator, not another person.

Laugh loudly, laugh often, and most important, laugh at yourself.

I can't be skinny all the time. I like to drink and I like to eat. I like burgers and bagels.

I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet people.

I'm very much about letting other people shine, because it makes us all shine brighter.

You do not OWN a dog. You HAVE a dog. And the dog HAS YOU

There are no warning signs on the trampoline. The warning is the trampoline.

I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker.

To the question: Wilderness, who needs it? Doc would say: Because we like the taste of freedom, comrades. Because we like the smell of danger. But, thought Hayduke, what about the smell of fear, Dad?

Art symbolizes our perfect ability in the matter of enriching the reality!

Politics is the enemy of the imagination.

The dignity of the individual demands that he be not reduced to vassalage by the largesse of others.

You gotta believe you can accomplish anything, and those who believe that they can accomplish anything, most likely will.

To disbelieve is easy; to scoff is simple; to have faith is harder.

What can I contribute that will significantly affect the performance and the results of the institution I serve?

Things like that become a blur - shot at some soundstage, somewhere - that's as much as I can remember.

Jesus Lord, kind Pelican, Cleanse my filth with Thy blood, One drop of which can save The whole world from all its sin

Life is a highway. I want to ride it all night long