The next MVP of the Super Bowl is just as likely to have been a full-time grocery store bagger last year as a Heisman Trophy winner.

The downward spiral of Dumbness in America is about to hit a new low.

Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that claim a God and the only thing that behaves like it hasn't got one.

Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whisky and drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested.

America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable.

So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?

Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing.

Hope rises and dreams flicker and die. Love plans for tomorrow and loneliness thinks of yesterday. Life is beautiful and living is pain.

The Play's the Thing, wherein I'll catch the conscience of the King.

Perfection does not exist; to understand it is the triumph of human intelligence; to expect to possess it is the most dangerous kind of madness.

A brave world, sir, full of religion, knavery, and change: we shall shortly see better days.

Legislative enactments proceed from men carrying their views a long time back; while judicial decisions are made off hand.

I haven't tucked a sock in my pants for three years.

The salutory effect of surviving a heart-attack: One felt that nothing mattered beyond kindness, good manners and humour

It's gonna be short if it's news; put it at the top. Style's not an issue, just make it news.

We are always peace. To get rid of the idea that we are not peace is all that is required.

Disrespecting one's ethnicity or their religious preference, on and on and on, if they have a disability, is not anything that has to do with when we talk about democracy. Equality.

Be bold: Venus herself aids the stout-hearted.