The only thing I hate worse than prophecy is self-fulfilling prophecy

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

False hope really makes you cynical.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

It's not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That's predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.

You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

Here's the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He's never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He's totally - he's the white Kanye.

Perceptions may not be true, but its true for YOU!

You are not smoking cigarette, it's cigarette that is smoking you.

Planning cities is a necessary but risky business.

If I'm about to forget my kid's birthday, I want the phone to scream at me until I do something about it.

Nuthin' can avoid this shot 'cause it's hittin' It's so cool when you touch it, wear a mitten

It's always hard when you've known a person a long time and then you have to recognise that you have nothing left in common but your memories.

I realized that public affairs were also my affairs.

It is the crucifixion that distinguishes the new message from the mythologies of all other peoples.

What really dissatisfies in American civilisation is the want of the interesting, a want due chiefly to the want of those two great elements of the interesting, which are elevation and beauty.

I have learned over the years that when one's mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.