The only thing I'm addicted to is winning. This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent.

I don't have a tuxedo that fits anymore because my chest and my biceps are too big.

I'm tired of pretending like I'm not bitching, a total fricking rock star from Mars...

Boom, crush. Night, losers. Winning, duh.

I've got magic. I've got poetry at my fingertips.

People say it's lonely at the top, but I sure like the view.

I still don't have all the answers. I'm more interested in what I can do next than what I did last.

The best way to not get your heart broken, is pretending you don't have one.

It's quite fitting that Slash is getting a star on the very street Axl Rose will one day be sleeping on.

I am on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available. If you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.

My success rate is 100 percent. Do the math.

His will to live was waning, and it made him almost transparent, as though rather than dying, he might just disappear one day, leaving behind only a vague scent of regret.

Anytime you wonder about something, keep in mind and remember, there is something that can make you a wonder! Just ponder and take action in the right direction, and you shall surely be a wonder!

You get to the point where your demons, which are terrifying, get smaller and smaller and you get bigger and bigger.

Following the prophet is always right!

Don't let tradition paralyze your mind. Be receptive to new ideas. Be experimental. Try new approaches. Be progressive in everything you do.

Vocation is the place where the world's greatest need and a person's greatest joy meet.

We are immortal till our work is done.

I'm not as cool as I'm supposed to be.

Numb is the new deep.

There is no getting around it; Congress is failing the American people.