The only thing I said to my parents when I was a teenager was Hang up, I got it!

As a writer, the worst thing you can do is work in an environment of fear of rejection.

I suddenly had this really mad desire to have an affair with a woman. I was divorced. I was childless. I figured there's got to be one more way to really tick off my mom.

Time flies, though, huh? But I feel young. And do you know how I stay feeling young, ladies and gentlemen? I'll share my secret with you: I live in a senior citizen retirement community.

I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.

I was over there in Hawaii. I was there on the big island. The 'Big Island' - that name cracks me up. First of all, it's not that big, so I'm pretty sure a guy came up with that name.

They're all sources of material. What I love about what I do, the more you talk about your life, there are so many people who have similar experiences.

All my other relationships with men, there was so much maneuvering and strategic decisions and stuff.

Women, stop buying the lingerie. Stop buying it right now. Oh, it's a big rip off. Oh my god, $18 bucks for panties this big? Come on, one trip through the dryer, and it's a frilly bookmark.

Just be your authentic self because there's nothing sexier or more beautiful than that.

I'm not afraid of putting myself out there to someone and then them passing on it. At least you could have gotten a 'yes.' So it's worthwhile to have the cojones to do it.

The philosophy of poetry must acknowledge that the poetic act has no past, at least no recent past, in which its preparation and appearance could be followed.

In fine, a life of good or evil, the hope of Heaven or the despair of Hell, Faustus stands as a reminder that the choice between these two absolutes also falls to us.

Never allow negative energy to dominate the pleasures of an experience

Do not offer help to those who do not want to help themselves.

When I am working on a problem, I never think about beauty but when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.

To labour is the lot of man below; And when Jove gave us life, he gave us woe.

He who accuses another of being an evil person says so because he is afraid of him.

Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, a forgetting of the breath.

I think Im pretty politically informed, and I find myself watching Senate hearings on C-SPAN.

The inclination of my life...has been to do things & make things which will give pleasure to people in new and amazing ways.