The perfect Christmas gift for a sportscaster, as all fans of sports clichés know, is a scoreless tie.

Never assume the obvious is true.

Nobody stands taller than those willing to stand corrected.

To be accused of 'channeling' is to be dismissed as a ventriloquist's live dummy, derogated at not having a mind of one's own.

When articulation is impossible, gesticulation comes to the rescue.

As long as one American is hungry... then we have unfinished business in this country.

It is in the nature of tyranny to deride the will of the people as the voice of the mob, and to denounce the cry for freedom as the roar of anarchy.

The right to do something does not mean that doing it is right.

Only in grammar can you be more than perfect.

The Latin motto over Poindexter's new Pentagon office reads Scientia Est Potentia - "knowledge is power." Exactly: the government's infinite knowledge about you is its power over you.

Last, but not least, avoid cliches like the plague.

God change us in every circumstance.

If we master a bit of drawing, everything else is possible.

United Airlines: Passengers are our worst enemy. We're not too fond of luggage either.

We are not all great because we are inspired, but we feel great because we are.

With the people, for the people, by the people. I crack up when I hear it; I say, with the handful, for the handful, by the handful, cause that's what really happens.

That's the great thing about incubating something on the web: you have the potential to go to other platforms. Every single platform has a different audience that you find.

We are the living graves of murdered beasts.

If adventures will not befall a young lady in her own village, she must seek them abroad.

A successful individual typically sets his next goal somewhat, but not too much, above his last achievement.

I'm having as much fun today as I did when I made $55 a week, because it is as much fun