The problem with winter sports is that -- follow me closely here -- they generally take place in winter.

You should definitely visit the Louvre, a world-famous art museum where you can view, at close range, the backs of thousands of other tourists trying to see the Mona Lisa.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

You are the artist, and your days the canvas. Will you create an original masterpiece, or live a paint-by-numbers kind of life?

A handful of patience is worth more than a bushel of brains.

If you can lie, you can act, and if you can lie to crazy girlfriends, you can act under pressure.

In all things that are purely social we can be as separate as the fingers, yet one as the hand in all things essential to mutual progress.

Never criticize the composition of a Royal Highness. You never know who may have written it.

Instead of clearing his own heart the zealot tries to clear the world.

The intellectual was rejected and persecuted at the precise moment when the facts became incontrovertible, when it was forbidden to say that the emperor had no clothes.

The probability of success is difficult to estimate; but if we never search the chance of success is zero.

Every one that flatters thee Is no friend in misery. Words are easy, like the wind, Faithful friends are hard to find.

I don't use specific brands really. It's just that for my skin, I need as high an SPF factor as I can get my hands on. That's the only rule.