The reason ... our pervasive cultural irony is at once so powerful and so unsatisfying is that an ironist is impossible to pin down.

I do things like get in a taxi and say, "The library, and step on it.

It can become an exercise in trying to get the reader to like and admire you instead of an exercise in creative art.

One of the things that makes Wittgenstein a real artist to me is that he realized that no conclusion could be more horrible than solipsism.

If your fidelity to perfectionism is too high, you never do anything.

I know I'm paranoid, but am I paranoid enough?

This might be one way to start talking about differences between the early postmodern writers of the fifties and sixties and their contemporary descendants.

How odd I can have all this inside me and to you it’s just words.

Everybody is identical in their secret unspoken belief that way deep down they are different from everyone else.

In the day-to-day trenches of adult life, there is actually no such thing as atheism. There is no such thing as not worshipping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship.

In reality, there is no such thing as not voting: you either vote by voting, or you vote by staying home and tacitly doubling the value of some Diehard's vote.

The church is like Noah's ark. It stinks, but if you get out of it, you'll drown.

Those nights lying alone are not discontinuous with this cold hectic dawn. It is who I am.

I keep my eyes open. I pay attention to how different types of people express their personal style, how they put their clothes together.

Wherever I go, I run into myself.

Fair maid, white and red, Comb me smooth, and stroke my head; And every hair a sheave shall be, And every sheave a golden tree.

It is the bold man who every time does best, at home or abroad.

It's probably listening to country music that got me to start playing a lot cleaner, not as distorted.

Baseball is a team sport played by individuals for themselves.

Moth, that wasn't very nice.

Fear is the underminer of all determinations; and necessity, the victorious rebel of all laws.