The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver.

According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man's best friend is his dog.

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.

Politics is just show business for ugly people.

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?'

Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution.

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.

Missing someone, they say, is self-centered.I self-center you more than ever.

Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.

To test a man's character, give him power. Once people have power they will always reveal themselves.

The mind is always present. You just don't see it.

Jnana yoga is a very demanding practice. It's necessary for you to become conscious of the fact that you're not human.

It’s a small thing to help one animal, but to that one animal it’s a big thing

Its funny how you can let yourself forget for seconds, how even in the heat of the horrible, you can have moments when you fool yourself into thinking it might all be okay

I think it's too late. I think that there's been too much. This all started with the red line, walking away from it. The inability to arm the legitimate [Bashar] Assad opposition.

What was your greatest challenge? Staying alive as a business, staying ahead of the game, and melding my business life with my personal life.

Have caviar if you like, but it tastes like herring to me.