The rules may seem obvious but when you think about them they're not. For somebody who has my job they're not as obvious as one would think.

If you're into social justice it's hard not to be on black people's side.

Whoever has the most at stake should have the most power.

The victory of the show is in the writing. Coming up with sketches and stand-up bits. The rest is just hitting buttons on a machine more or less.

When I say the n-word, black people are clear that I'm on their side. And it's not disingenuous - I am on black people's side, clearly.

People get way too much credit at funerals.

[Robert Smigel] is one of the greatest comedy writers in the last 50 years. "TV Funhouse" and Triumph and all those sketches.He's really unique, and he has an amazing comedy mind.

I think it's naïve to think white people aren't singing along directly!

Models never say, "I'm hot." They say, "Look at these clothes." Whereas, with comedy, you have to say, "I'm hot."

I guess I like people doing roasts in public. That's my thing.

I'm making fun of midwestern homophobia [in the joke], but I'm still saying faggot. And almost every month as I'm doing that joke it gets five percent less of a laugh.

Usually, if you think something's wrong, it probably is...

Not only do unemployment benefits help families who are hurting they also put money into their pockets that they'll then spend - and their spending will keep other Americans in jobs.

Sometimes you have to look into a mirror and look at the worst you could have been if you're ever going to know the best you were meant to be.

Failure isn't failure if a lesson from it's learned. I guess love would not be love without a risk of being burned.

We often think of choice as a thing. But a choice is not a thing. Our options may be things, but a choice—a choice is an action. It is not just something we have but something we do.

There are many marks of a true lady but I believe that one of them is to walk with her head held high while her world falls apart around her.

I think it's important for every man to find the right woman and every woman to find the right man.

Books are always good company if you have the right sort.

If you could touch the alien sand and hear the cries of strange birds, and watch them wheel in another sky, would that satisfy you?

The attitude of unhappiness is not only painful, it is mean and ugly.