The saying goes, if you love something, let it go. I always though it was better to just shoot the damn thing so it'd never go anywhere.

There is no code among men because there are no men anymore. Only monsters who sit behind their desks and give orders.

I'll not listen to reason... reason always means what someone else has got to say.

Employment... is so essential to human happiness that indolence is justly considered the mother of misery.

Laughter isn't even the other side of tears. It is tears turned inside out. Truly the suffering is great, here on earth.

We speak loud. And we speak with our hands, but we're not aggressive like warwise. A Portuguese is not going to punch you for no reason.

I bought a new pair of pajamas with pockets, which is great, cause now i don't have to hold things when I sleep.

What a strange thing it is to recognize a sound like the shriek of a wounded animal, when you've never heard the shriek of a wounded animal.

I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.

If life on Planet Earth was really supposed to be a picnic, we would all have been born clutching gingham tablecloths.

Once she read a book but found it distasteful because it contained adjectives.

The truth is that men can have several sorts of pleasure. The true pleasure is the one for which they abandon the other.