The sun is simple. A sword is simple. A storm is simple. Behind everything simple is a huge tail of complicated.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Screw chocolate. A good steak is where it’s at.

Sneaky, manipulating, merciless bloodsucker . . ." A chuckle drifted up to me. "Pillow talk already? You'll have me hard before we're even back in our room.

Social support is everything.

I said 'It can't go on' and he said 'No, it can't.' Honestly, I don't think I could have mattered less to him by then. But by then, nothing mattered to him.

Trivial losses often prove great gains.

A great teacher makes hard things easy.

The only way out is through.

Highways are full of careless drivers who are always too close in front of you.

Don't ever regret being honest. Period.

What a beautiful future it will be! Don't worry about life being boring. It will never be.