The theory of relativity doesn't amount to a hill of beans when there's a bonfire in your shorts.

Maybe curiosity did kill your cat. But it wouldn't hurt to keep an eye on the neighbor's rottweiler just the same.

Even choosing the perfect dinner wine loses its earth-shattering importance if your guests happen to be cannibals, and you, the unsuspecting entree.

A pigs and pain, until you really get to know 'em. Then he's a paid with the soul.

Analyzing dreams is much like walking on water. There are a limited number of people who do it well.

Booze and boys, ain't nothing in the universe that'll make a girl stupid faster.

Maybe knowledge is power, but it's damned hard to think a burglar to death.

Some men are warriors and some men are weenies. The trick is figuring out which is which.

Maybe life does suck, Pork Chop, but it beats the hell out of the alternative.

Just when you think you have life by the tail, it's likely to whip around and take a hunk outta your balls.

There is no greater hell than realizing you're in love with the guy you hate.

what is a journeywithout someone who wandersif sometimes a pairis made of two

When I am brave enough to say goodbyeI'll use the wings you gave meand away I'll fly

Unbidden guests Are often welcomest when they are gone.

You can tell a lot about a civilization by the quality of the people found in its jails.

No one remembers who took second place and that will neverbe me.

The man who lives in a small community lives in a much larger world... The reason is obvious. In a large community we can choose our companions. In a small community our companions are chosen for us.

There are a million ways to make money in the markets. The irony is that they are all very difficult to find.

The only exercise I excel at is jumping to conclusions.

You will find hardly any improvising on camera anywhere in my films. It's very structured, but it's all worked out from elaborate improvisations over a long period, as you know.

The Exploitation of Religion Must Be Opposed.