The thing with crowns is, it isn't the putting them on that's the problem, it's the taking them off.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Pursue your dreams with all diligence.

She put her hands on her hips. "You're not human." "Neither are you." "I beg your pardon?" "Ethereal comes to mind.

Is there another word for synonym?

I like classical music of the late 19th and early 20th centuries, and I adore Bach above all.

Cynicism can be funny. But it's the easy way. You'll forget to enjoy anything. I try to make the evolving choice, the forward-moving, life-giving choice. Just keep living, man.

If you have a brain, you are obliged to use it.

I have never acted he has never been cast in a romantic lead or has been cast opposite a female love interest in any movie he starred in.

It's the tyranny of an oligarchy that I'm concerned about.

In the same way that a small child cannot draw a bad picture so a child of God cannot offer a bad prayer.

Piety and morality are but the same spirit differently manifested. Piety is religion with its face toward God; morality is religion with its face toward the world.