The things I did on Saturday Night Live are going to stay as Saturday Night Live. You've never seen Eddie Murphy do a Gumby movie. There's a lot more new material inside of me.

Affirmative action was designed to keep women and minorities in competition with each other to distract us while white dudes inject AIDS into our chicken nuggets.

My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality.

And when I was angry, when I was younger, I was in a cocoon. Now I'm a beautiful, black butterfly.

Bad news travels at the speed of light; good news travels like molasses.

I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but it's cool to have strong and powerful pets.

I see knowledge of self. I know who I am. When I look in the mirror, I see me.

Don't follow in my footsteps. Be original, and create your own path. Be a trailblazer! Do you! Be better than me. Do you! Be happy and have joy in your life.

I love my mother. My mother made sure, her stubbornness - she made sure we was going to eat. She made sure we had Christmases. That was my mother. My father wasn't there for that.

My father said: "If you want to catch your girl cheating, you knock on the front door and run to the back, because he's coming out the back."

I love this cornbread so much, I wanna take it behind a middle school and get it pregnant.

I’ve come to understand that life is a constant letting go.

Honey, when I look at you, you're right, I don't see anything similar to those other women. But don't you see? That's what makes you so special. That's why I love you.

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

Sin, every day, takes out a patent for some new invention.

In the planting of the seeds of most trees, the best gardeners do no more than follow Nature, though they may not know it.

A brave nation fights only because it must; a cowardly nation fights because it can.

They're a dark people with a gift for suffering way past their deserving. It's said that without whiskey to soak and soften the world, they'd kill themselves. (Irish)

The bible knows nothing of solitary religion.

I feel like people are expecting me to fail, therefore, I expect myself to win.

I don't really judge. To each his own. You like what you like.