The truth is, Pavlov's dog trained Pavlov to ring this bell just before the dog salivated.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

You must understand that when you are writing a novel you are not making anything up. It's all there and you just have to find it.

Just because someone stumbles and loses their path, doesn't mean they're lost forever.

If her soul ever leaks, I want it to land on me.

Read over your compositions and when you meet a passage which you think is particularly fine strike it out.

I could always throw stuff, starting with tantrums.

Apart from anything else, I find boots are too hot except in wintry weather. At home I usually wear a sweater, shirt and slacks.

If you don't believe in yourself nobody else will believe in you.

I did very much enjoy being part of an independent film. It was just the energy.

I've always written songs the same way. You learn different tricks - you learn craft, you learn structure, all that - as you go.

I loved. I lost. So I learned to love what is never lost. Then even what I loved that can be lost was through what cannot be lost...so it was never lost.