The truth is somewhere in the middle of funny and serious.

I did not become successful in my work through embracing or engaging in celebrity culture. I never signed away my privacy in exchange for success.

If you chase something too desperately, it eludes you.

When I was a student I was very, very ambitious, completely immersed in my comedy career. I never had that period of reckless hedonism that you should get out of your system in your youth.

I don't like big feet. It reminds me of gammon.

If things don't come easy to you, you have to pull a rabbit out of a hat.

Me, myself, personally, I like to keep myself private. I have never said I am a paragon of virtue, a model of morality. I simply do what I do.

The trick is always to write in pairs because if at least two people find it funny, you've immediately halved the odds of it not being funny.

I think if you try to look for something to show off as an actor, vanity can get the better of you.

I am of the very last generation who didn't have computers at school. As we grow old we'll become something of an aberration.

Actually the best thing I did was to get thrown out by my wife. She's living with a fitness instructor. He drinks that yellow stuff in tins. He's an idiot.

Because deep down you know that someone needs to keep you out of trouble.

Never expect others to be like you, it can be the biggest nightmare!!! Collaboration and synchronization needs to be found in the difference

All the works of man have their origin in creative fantasy. What right have we then to depreciate imagination.

May your character not be a writing upon the sand, but an inscription upon the rock!

My parents always talk about Puerto Rico. My dad's whole family lives in Puerto Rico. My great grandma lives in Puerto Rico and I got to meet her a couple years ago.

The best movies now are called 'thrillers.' Because if you use the word 'horror,' people's associations are straight-to-video crap.

I'm one of those people who sees Frank Zappa in a cup of coffee, or elephants wrestling in clouds. But also, conscious creation of all kinds moves me.

This is for all the little Stingers

Gardening symbolizes our race's primordial acceptance of a responsibility and role in rectifying the harm done to the creation through sin.