The way to stop political correctness is to not do it. If someone says, You offended me then you say I don't care! If they're offended by the truth, that's their issue!

Who is more irrational, the guy who believes in a God he can't see, or a guy who's offended by a God he doesn't believe in?

If we all die and there is no God, then it's just eternal unconsciousness, you'll never know, but if you're wrong... you'll know forever.

Get out of our schools God, get out of our textbooks God, get out of our government God, go away God, go away God, go away God, Katrina hits, God, where are you?

We should have a way of telling people they have bad breath without hurting their feelings. Well, I'm bored. Let's go brush our teeth. Or, I've got to make a phone call. Hold this gum in your mouth.

Talk about sexist - have you ever, ever, heard someone come up to a woman and say 'find your masculine side?' And by the way women, if you find your masculine side - I'm not interested.

If God is a crutch, then atheism is a coma.

I suffer from two phobias: 1) Phobia-Phobia, the fear that you're unable to get scared, and 2) Xylophataquieopiaphobia, the fear of not pronouncing words correctly.

If the truth conflicts with my beliefs, I change my beliefs.

I don't hate cats...as long as they stay on the freeway, where they belong.

The truth is supposed to hurt. That's how it lets you know you don't got it.

Pulped in his crushing strength, his hug is enough to smear me over his body like war paint.

I made baseball as much fun as doing your taxes!

At SAP, we see a dream for a simpler world, for a simpler SAP, and for a simpler customer experience.

This means keeping many trails open at once, inevitably requiring a fairly 'parallel' plot. This plot should be discovered rather than announced, so show, don't tell.

A peculiarity of the higher arithmetic is the great difficulty which has often been experienced in proving simple general theorems which had been suggested quite naturally by numerical evidence.

What you need to learn, children, is the difference between right and wrong in every area of life. And once you learn the difference, you must always choose the right.

The folktale is the primer of the picture-language of the soul.

Because wine means the responsible part of the day is over.

I live a bit outside of Stockholm and I almost never go into town. I can live anywhere, I think.

There is nothing to say because I know everything about him. I raised him. I know what's a charade, and I know what's not a charade. I'll leave it at that.