The wisest fool in Christendom.

The state of monarchy is the supremest thing upon earth: for kings are not only God's Lieutenants upon earth, and sit upon God's throne, but even by God himself they are called Gods.

I will govern according to the common weal, but not according to the common will.

I can make a lord, but only God can make a gentleman.

When a man makes up his mind to thrash another, he must also make up his mind to be a little thrashed himself.

To make women learned and foxes tame has the same effect - to make them more cunning.

If I were not a king, I would be a university man; and if it were so that I must be a prisoner, if I might have my wish, I would desire to have no other prison than that library [the Bodleian].

Were I not a king, I would be a university man.

On tobacco: A branch of the sin of drunkenness, which is the root of all sins.

Herein is not only a great vanity, but a great contempt of God's good gifts, that the sweetness of man's breath, being a good gift of God, should be willfully corrupted by this stinking smoke.

It is atheism and blasphemy to dispute what God can do: good Christians content themselves with His will revealed in His Word.

To question what I see, then to question what I see after that, because the questions matter as much, perhaps more than, the answers.

Change is one of the scariest things in the world and yet it is also one of those variables of human existence that no one can avoid.

Writing a book has about it some of the anxiety of telling a joke and having to wait several years to know whether or not it was funny.

I prefer to sleep with deaf girls. Those crazy chicks never have a safe word.

I don't want to be identified by any one role I do.

The principal end both of my father and of myself in the conquest of India... has been the propagation of the holy Catholic faith.

So I write melodies - thirty, forty, fifty - then I cast them off until I have just two or three. If only one is needed, I go see the director and ask him to decide.

You must be careful how you walk and where you go, for there are those following you who will set their feet where yours are set.

the scythers, Time and Death, Helmed locusts, move upon the tree of breath

The establishment of a central bank is 90% of communizing a nation.