The writers led by Mike Scully are fantastic. And they're creating original stories that not only don't repeat what we've already done, they also don't repeat anything I've seen on television.

Son, if you really want something in life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

The scary thing about the future... there will be tiny cameras everywhere, and they'll be flying around like mosquitoes and drones. That will be bad. Drones are scary. You can't reason with a drone.

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.

We can be knowledgeable with another man's knowledge, but we can't be wise with another man's wisdom.

I want to score this book 10. —KazkgbBillionaire's Indulgence #1

In a country that doesn't discriminate between fame and infamy, the latter presents itself as plainly more achievable.

He who shuns the millstone shuns the meal.

I do what I do. You like it, great. You don't, go listen to somebody else. I'm stickin' with the people who stuck with me.

Mystical bliss, joy and rapture arises when you realize the inner Sun.

Why should I say I will retire in three or four years? You retire the very moment you utter those words.

'The Simpsons' is about alienation and the ambivalence of living with a family who you love but who drive you completely crazy.

My parents were overprotective because you could get kidnapped and bombs were exploding in the streets.

Just as all the world loves a lover, it has been my experience that all the world loves a trailerite.