There are no cartoons about happy marriages.

Humor is basically a cognitive process. And it's a creative process not only on the part of the cartoonist but on the part of the viewer.

There is no Algorithm for Humor

While the end-of-the-world scenario will be rife with unimaginable horrors, we believe that the pre-end period will be filled with unprecedented opportunities for profit.

Im pretty adept with computers and Photoshop for my blog, and I found my style with a conversational voice and an image-ready column.

If you have any problems at all, don't hesitate to shut up.

I do find that humor helps in relationships. It certainly helps in my marriage now because I'm a very, very fallible person. And if I wasn't funny I'd be kicked right out the door.

The digital realm give cartoons and cartoonists more possibilities for exposure.

There is humor that's just whimsy, that we smile at, but the humor that we laugh at, someone has to be - someone's dignity has to be reduced.

Each cartoon needs the right amount of wrong.

Humor levels the playing field. I understood that early on - that was something I had.

At the age of 46, forgetfulness & confusion had become a daily aspect of life.

Homeless people bear God's image too.

Looking back, my greatest regret is not that I didn't love them enough (to the brink of insanity and back again), but that I couldn't save them from themselves.

I'm not God but if I were God, ¾ of you would be girls, and the rest would be pizza and beer.

I never saw myself as a comedian. I saw myself as a guy who can act funny.

A journey of four hundred and thirty miles can be made in any part of the United States, but in Turkey it takes as many days.

The remedy now is two scotches and an aspirin, I think.

In reasoning upon moral subjects, we have great occasion for candor, in order to compare circumstances, and weigh arguments with impartiality.

After a decade in a club it's quite normal and necessary that you seek and take a new challenge.

Throughout the history of the sport, the heavyweight champion has been... a reason to talk about boxing at the water cooler.