There are no uncriminal crimes.

I don't want you to play me a riff that's going to impress Joe Satriani; give me a riff that makes a kid want to go out and buy a guitar and learn to play.

Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most.

I got rabies shots for biting the head off a bat but that's OK - the bat had to get Ozzy shots.

Maybe it's not too late to learn how to love and forget how to hate.

Sometimes I'm scared of being Ozzy Osbourne. But it could have been worse. I could have been Sting.

If you can laugh at your mistakes, it's a good thing.

My son Jack just got out of rehab, he's 17 years old and he got hooked on Oxycontin and I'm just a little pissed off that he never gave me a few.

Hating people isn’t a productive way of living. So what’s the point in hating anyone? There’s enough hate in the world as it is, without me adding to it.

When you’re in love, it’s not just about the messing around in the sack, it’s about how empty you feel when they’re gone.

You've got to believe in yourself, or no one will believe in you. Imagination is like a bird on the wing, flying free for you to use.

Knowledge has a materiality, not unlike the materiality of a ladder, that can be used to gain access to places and worlds that were previously unimaginable.

Justice is as much a matter of fashion as charm is.

Piety is the tinfoil of pretense.

New Customers come from the action of past customers

After denial comes anger and finally, acceptance.

My mom just told me the lines, because I didn't know how to read yet. I copied them and that's what I did.

[Jeffrey Lewis is] The best lyricist working in the US today.

Lenin lived, Lenin lives, Lenin will live.

Actors, they come and go, you know.

Your mind, this globe of awareness, is a starry universe. When you push off with your foot, a thousand new roads become clear.