There exists a false aristocracy based on family name, property, and inherited wealth. But there likewise exists a true aristocracy based on intelligence, talent and virtue.

Reality whistles a different tune underwater.

We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.

Religion is not merely the opium of the masses, it's the cyanide.

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak.

The beet is the most intense of vegetables

Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.

It is better to be small, colorful, sexy, careless, and peaceful.

To achieve the impossible; it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought.

We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves.

The minute I stopped trying to find the right girl, and started trying to become the right guy...the girl came.

The father of Egyptology was Father Athanasius Kircher.

Deep in the sea are riches beyond compare, But if you seek safety, it is on the shore.

We would be better off thinking of nature as a tiger than as a docile and compliant automaton that can never threaten our survival.

Dreams are the guiding words of the Soul.

I'll direct any movie starring a monkey or the Olsen Twins. Preferably both.

Dirt is matter in the wrong place.

Absence, the highest form of presence.

A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit!

I would like for my kids to at least have some familiarity with who I am: "It's the man from TV!"