There have been better attempts at marching, and they have been made by penguins.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Cherish the beauty and cherish the pain, both will give you experience and you will never be the same

Two hands working can do more than a thousand clasped in prayer.

it’s funny how I’m encouraged to go to school so much, but I’ve learned more valuable things on google then from school.

Christians and camels receive their burdens kneeling.

The English are predisposed to pride, the French to vanity.

Your opinion of yourself is your most important viewpoint. You are infinitely greater than you think you are.

The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger. It is his glory to overlook an offense.

I get it,' said the prisoner. 'Good Cop, Bad Cop, eh?' If you like.' said Vimes. 'But we're a bit short staffed here, so if I give you a cigarette would you mind kicking yourself in the teeth?

I venture to say that it's not enough to respect and tolerate religions other than our own.

It is for us to begin. If we take one step towards the Lord, he takes ten towards us -- he who saw the prodigal son while he was at a distance, and had compassion and ran and embraced him.