There is no feature as attractive as a well exercised intellect.

I've been a little cranky since that house fell on my sister.

A balanced diet and a brisk daily walk will help keep you healthy, but there's nothing like a good-looking young man with a nice butt to help up your cardiovascular system.

You are a perfect woman, a magical blend of beauty, intelligence, and spirit. Without you, my life is nothing.

Yeah, world peace would be all right, but what about a day off in a slab of ham the size of my head.

There aren't many things a man finds more appealing than loyalty. Unless it's a woman with really big knockers.

I'd trade every last one of you for a moment's peace and a dog that didn't P on the carpet

If they really wanted us to resist temptation, they shouldn't a made it so damn tempting.

It's not as if I don't like men, I just have more respect for my washing machine.

In my experience, "what the hell" is generally the most interesting decision.

There is not a simple gene pool entirely free of toxic waste.

Success comes from closing the gap between who you are today and your ultimate potential.

You were, arecactus tourism. meeting you: granularfractals borrowed from oceans.

Some arrogant feel very confident that they are the best.That's pity. Much better men let them feel so for a reason.

Losses are comparative imagination only makes them of any moment.

Gossip is called gossip because it's not always the truth.

In a conflict between the heart and the brain, follow your heart.

I will tell you, when 20 6-year-olds are gunned down and Congress literally does nothing, yeah that's the closest I came to feeling disgusted.

Breaks like a ball falling off a pool table.

When Mrs. Jinnah feels cold, she will say so, and ask for a wrap herself.

I try to put myself into unusual and difficult situations as often as I can in order to capture the element of struggle in the music.