There is no man that is knowingly wicked but is guilty to himself; and there is no man that carries guilt about him but he receives a sting in his soul.

Ignorance and inconsideration are the two great causes of the ruin of mankind.

A good word is an easy obligation; but not to speak ill requires only our silence, which costs us nothing.

Of all parts of wisdom the practice is the best.

Was ever any wicked man free from the stings of a guilty conscience?

The art of using deceit and cunning grow continually weaker and less effective to the user.

Sincerity is to speak as we think, to do as we pretend and profess, to perform and make good what we promise, and really to be what we would seem and appear to be.

Our belief or disbelief of a thing does not alter the nature of the thing.

Integrity gains strength by use.

Convulsive anger storms at large; or pale And silent, settles into full revenge.

Malice and hatred are very fretting and vexatious, and apt to make our minds sore and uneasy; but he that can moderate these affections will find ease in his mind.

Figs are delicious with soft cheese and ham, Toast is quite scrumptious with butter and jam, Eggs are improved by parsley and salt, But milkshakes are best with strawberries and malt.

This high official, all allow, is grossly overpaid; there wasn't any Board, and now there isn't any Trade.

Some maniac butcher is trying to hack away your balls.

The best thing about where comedy is now is if you have a little bit of talent and a strong work ethic, and strong social skills, you can make a name for yourself and you can make money.

The thought: A logical inquiry

My father was the funniest man I ever met. He made Redd Foxx look like an undertaker.

I'm sure I could fall in love with a Democrat as easily as a Republican. Some things transcend politics.

Having consolidated its power, and taking the lead of the peasantry, the proletariat of the victorious country can and must build a socialist society.

Don't accept the excuse of complexity.

There is nothing in cricket more calculated to raise a laugh than the sight of some determined and serious man under a spiralling catch.