There is no more terrible fate for a comedian than to be taken seriously.

Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.

I know body hair bothers some women, but a lot of men like a fluffy partner.

Australia is an outdoor country. People only go inside to use the toilet. And that's only a recent development.

To live in Australia permanently is rather like going to a party and dancing all night with one's mother.

I drift along, thinking about the past a great deal. The past is so reliable, so delightful, and the best place to live. I end up there quite often, you know; it's very comfortable and dependable.

It's an old Aboriginal word meaning 'Let's get together and have fun'. They gave us the word because they had no further need for it.

I have outlived most of my more athletic contemporaries who jogged, golfed and squashed themselves into coronary occlusion.

The truth is deafening, no matter how softly it is spoken.

New Zealand is a country of thirty thousand million sheep, three million of whom think they are human.

He's very, very well-known. I'd say he's world-famous in Melbourne.

Horrors of a nature most stern and most appalling would too frequently obtrude themselves upon my mind, and shake the innermost depths of my soul with the bare supposition of their possibility.

There is a time in every life when paths are chosen, character is forged. I could have chosen a different path. But I didn’t. I failed myself.

The savants will write excellent volumes. There will be laureates. But wars will continue just the same until the forces of the circumstances render them impossible.

It's not by amusing oneself that one learns.

Every time you take a step and walk with your fear, you'll never know the impact. But you can be certain somebody's watching, and that courage is contagious.

In this metropolis a number of lurking leeches infamously gain subsistence by practicing on the credulity of women.

There are only two markets, ultraluxury and subsidized housing.

The soul is not ruled by time and space. The soul is infinite. It blends with the One in infinity.

It's the priests who have demands, not the gods.

There are times where I am trying to make the big play before I even catch the football.