There is not much less vexation in the government of a private family than in the managing of an entire state.

The value of life lies not in the length of days, but in the use we make of them... Whether you find satisfaction in life depends not on your tale of years, but on your will.

Valor is stability, not of legs and arms, but of courage and the soul.

The greatest thing in the world is to know how to belong to oneself.

A man who fears suffering is already suffering from what he fears.

My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened.

There is no conversation more boring than the one where everybody agrees.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Experience has taught me this, that we undo ourselves by impatience. Misfortunes have their life and their limits, their sickness and their health.

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside equally desperate to get out.

The most certain sign of wisdom is cheerfulness.

Writers write. Everyone else makes excuses.

You'll get my assault weapon when you pry it out of my curious six-year-old's cold dead hands.

They were back. The demons in all their glory. And they had a plan. I made plans sometimes, too, but they rarely involved world domination. Hot dogs on a grill, maybe. Tequila.

I'm pretty good with not being afraid to just go up to people and introduce myself.

Your suffering is something you choose. Experience it fully. Without it you will not achieve personal growth and higher consciousness.

Prince William definitely isn't my type, he's too horsey-looking.

A man should dress in a way that you don't notice. He looks good and you don't know why. But it's the tailoring, the materials, and the clothes.

It's about us getting ready to play. It's not about the other team. We'll beat ourselves before they beat us. That's always our approach.

I can go into restaurants and a whole table will get up and clap if they recognize me, because they love Fox News. Other places - or even the same place - people will turn the other way.

Wit is, in fact, the eloquence of indifference.