There's a man outside with a big black mustache. - Tell him I've got one.

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.

Men only treat women like princesses when they want to use them like prostitutes.

You mortal! You time-poor! Don’t waste your scarce time to be patient!

When one has seen something of the world and human nature, one must conclude, after all, that between people in like stations of life there is very little difference the world over.

Government is the only enterprise in the world which expands in size when its failures increase.

With "The Office," they said, "We don't want anyone we recognize, so give us unknown actors," and I think that was the break that I needed. Because I went in and I got the role.

Unfortunately, little attention was paid to how Arafat ruled. In fact, some saw the harsh and repressive nature of Arafat's regime as actually bolstering the prospects for peace.

It can really vary from movie to movie what the producer's role is and there are all kinds of producers. There are line producers who do a lot of the nuts and bolts work on the set.

However important it is that love shall precede marriage, it is far more important that it shall continue after marriage.

Happiness expanded like an explosion inside me – so extreme, so violent that I wasn’t sure I’d survive it.

In this country we find it pays to shoot an admiral from time to time to encourage the others.