There's absolutely nothing wrong with Oscar Levant that a miracle can't fix.

All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.

There is no such thing in anyone's life as an unimportant day.

It comes from the likes of you! Take what you can get! Grab the chances as they come along! Act in hallways! Sing in doorways! Dance in cellars!

The two oldest professions in the world — ruined by amateurs.

All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening.

I'm tired of hearing it said that democracy doesn't work. Of course it doesn't work. We are supposed to work it.

Many of us spend half of our time wishing for things we could have if we didn't spend half our time wishing.

At 83, George Bernard Shaw's mind was perhaps not quite as good as it used to be, but it was still better than anyone else's.

To all things clergic I am allergic.

A hick town is one where there is no place to go where you shouldn't go.

... I firmly believe that a woman can be whatever she wants to be if she sets her mind to it.

Cancer - a more or less permanent traffic jam in the body.

There is an end to every journey.

I'm totally sports-oriented; I relate a lot of my career and everything to sports.

We are way more powerful when we turn to each other and not on each other, when we celebrate our diversity, focus on our commonality, and together tear down the mighty walls of injustice.

Our final experience, like our first, is conjectural. We move between two darkness's.

Fear is the genesis of most of the good things that have occurred in my life. Fear is the beginning of every success I've lived.

This is Buffalo, New York. It's like. Scranton without the charm.

Only a man who is happy can create happiness in others.

A good action is preferable to an argument.